More Bangkok Nights

After travelling through Russia, Mongolia and China during winter, and especially after the worst snow storm China had seen for 50 years, I was ready for some warm weather. Thailand seemed to be a good choice to hang out while I organised gainful employment. I was really running low on money at this point, but my job hunting will be fully explored in another post. At length.

I was unfamiliar with Bangkok, but I’d heard stories with much eyebrow raising and knowing nods etc. The Major had himself send his first email back from the place proclaiming to was a debauched as we’d been lead to believe. This didn’t worry me, of course, due to my chameleonic ability to blend in anywhere by drinking too much, talking too much, then passing out. I booked a hostel just off Silom Road as it seemed to be fairly central and was quite cheap.

The flight was short and the food was surprisingly nice. It was a Sri Lankan Airlines flight to Colombo via Bangkok, where I got off. I was very pleased at how warm it was while waiting to get my passport stamped and collecting my luggage. When i got to the exit, the automatic doors opened and I was hit by a WALL OF HEAT. The delightful 21.00 warmth was only due to the terminal building’s air-con and I started sweating immediately. The airport coach took me, my borrowed army rucksack and my now very battered guitar right down Silom Road and I collapsed into my dorm bunk.

The next day I took a wander round a funny little market that was underneath the nearby motor way, then as it got later I decided to wander around the street as little stalls started to pop up around 21.00. For those of you that don’t know, the market at the other end of Silom Road is the quite famous Pad Pong. Famous for ping pong shows, that is. Yes, without realising it I had booked a hostel right in the middle of the Bangkok sex tourist district.

It started to dawn on me that something was amiss when people started jumping out of alleyways shouting “Sex DVD?” while holding hand drawn cardboard signs with “SEX DVD XXX” written on them in marker pen. There seemed to be a few of them mentioning ping pong shows. These chaps had laminated, full colour menus with prices for a variety of shows based around ping pong balls and other assorted objects. I wasn’t sure if all of Bangkok was like this or if I’d just found the dodgiest area. What really “sealed the deal” so to speak was a rather chubby gentleman in a loud shirt with a medallion who asked if I was hungry. “You like Thai food?” he enquired “We do best authentic food”. I politely declined “Well two for one drinks at my bar! It’s happy hour!” I told him I was happy just looking around. “You like boys? Come to my boy-bar. I’ll get you blow job! Boy-bar!”

Well I’m sure some of you are wondering how I could refuse such an offer, but I smartly walked away trying not to burst out laughing while he danced behind me declaring “Boy-bar! Blowjob!” repeatedly. I didn’t stay at that hostel long and eventually moved a little further out of the city to the wonderful Hi-Sukhumvit.